TOP TEN REASONS TO ASK YOUR BOSS FOR A RAISE:

10. You take your paycheck to the bank and the teller bursts
out in hysterical laughter.

9. The Red Cross calls and offers you emergency assistance.

8. Your only charge cards are for the Salvation Army, ARC,
and DAV thrift stores.

7. You work full time and you still qualify for food stamps.

6. You empty out your piggy bank and then cook the bank and
serve it for your Easter ham.

5. All you can think about morning, noon and night is
clipping grocery coupons.

4. You file your income taxes and the IRS returns them
stamped, "Charity Case -- Return To Sender."

3. You set the world record for mailing $1.00 rebate requests
to Young America, Minnesota.

2. You pay all your bills, put your remaining $1 bill into
your billfold and it goes into shock.

1. You get arrested for taking the coins out of the fountain
in the mall.